Thursday, July 16, 2009

Farrant Holiday To Be Covered By Cameras

LONDON - David Farrant's Information Technology expert Craig Adams unveiled his patented FarrantCam™ System today to a group of mid-day revelers at The Royal Oaks pub.

Development of the unique body mounted camera is apparently in preparation for the ex-vampire hunter's upcoming holiday in New Forest. "When he's down south at them beaches, in a certain southern area, like a road, for example, something quite, er, bonky could happen," advised Adams, "and we wanna capture whatever transpires for posterity's sake."

Of the Famous Royal Oaks, Adams comments he was "pleasantly surprised to be in a proper pub that's not been ruined or turned into a awful gastro pub like every other boozer in Muswell Hill."

6 comments:

David Farrant said...

Yes, our New Forest trip/holiday is imminent - not long now.

Personally, I'm very much looking forward to 'putting a nail in the coffin' of this 65-year old 'witch myth' ie that witches are supposed to meet there. (Although I suppose in a way they will be!).

Yes the cameras are up and running as well. Some complete with 'night vision' facilities. Nothing like the element of surprise!

Think I'll take Speed Queen for a dip in the sea after the mission has been completed. We will have earned it. Some ice cream on the beach, then back to 'grimy' London, but with one less weight on your mind!

David Farrant

Baldry's Cat said...

Well it's certain no one will try and drive a stake through you while that camera's watching.

David Farrant said...

No, that's true.
But let's remember, such things have been tried on camera (a better word might be 'faked') but if we can see published photographs of stakes going into beautiful young ladies and 'giant spiders'; then I guess I'd better be careful!

Camreas or no camera's, I don't want to get staked in the back by some 'vampire-hunting lunatic'!

Wouldn't do much good for my reputation as a 'vampire hunter'!

(Or his, come to that!).

David Farrant

David Farrant said...

For David:
It is slightly ironic that you are posting this for me, since I am about to criticise you. The belief that witches meet in the New Forest, for instance at the old tree stump known as the Naked Man, is certainly more than 65 years old. It is believed that seventeen of them, members of two separate covens, assembled there on the night of 21 May 1940 to do a ritual to prevent the Nazis invading Britain. It cannot be said that it was not successful. However, it is thought that, having assembled there, they went to somewhere else less conspicuous for the ritual itself, which place I have not so far been able to identify. It is also said that so much energy was involved in the rite that they expended 'part of their life force', with the result that three of them died within the next fortnight, and I have only been able tentatively to identify one of these.
A visit to the Local Studies archive at Bournemouth Public Library might also be useful, since the last time I went there the microfilm reader was out of order.
Gareth J. Medway

David Farrant said...

I was not referring to historical 'witchcraft' events, Gareth' but to a 65-year-old relic that was recently discovered embalmed in an old cliii-top bungalow in Bournmouth.

The case baffled the police as the only real clues to its identity was a pot of putrid tea nearby minus its cosy and some plastic vampire fangs beside it stained with red ink.

"The whole thing is really bizarre", one police officer remarked. "But we suspected that some bizarre witchcraft rites had been taking place on the premises for some time. Its so close to the New Forest so it comes as no surprise really!"

So you see Gareth, you were confusing my historical dates!

David

David Farrant said...

Just to 'get my own back' a little Gareth . . .

When you said . . . "It is believed that seventeen of them, members of two separate covens, assembled there on the night of 21 May 1940 to do a ritual to prevent the Nazis invading Britain. It cannot be said that it was not successful".

Well, the witches might have stopped Hitler, but they certainly didn't stop some of his followers, did they!?

David